Lori Gottlieb and Dr. Rick Hanson

Recorded May 17th, 2020

Share this event

Find the books at Book Passage

Log in or register to watch the archive.

Lori Gottlieb and Dr. Rick Hanson
Sunday, May 17, 2020

Share this with someone who loves books.

Lori Gottlieb is a psychotherapist and author of the New York Times bestseller Maybe You Should Talk to Someone, which is being adapted as a television series by Eva Longoria and the creators of Emmy and Golden Globe-winning series “The Americans.” In addition to her clinical practice, she writes The Atlantic’s weekly “Dear Therapist” advice column and contributes regularly to The New York Times and many other publications. Her recent TED Talk is one of the top 10 most watched of the year, and she is a sought-after expert in media such as The Today Show, Good Morning America, The CBS Early Show, CNN, and NPR’s “Fresh Air.” Her new iHeart Radio podcast, “Dear Therapists,” produced by Katie Couric, will premiere this year. Learn more at LoriGottlieb.com.
Rick Hanson, PhD is a psychologist, Senior Fellow of UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center, and New York Times best-selling author. His books have been published in 29 languages and include Neurodharma, Resilient, Hardwiring Happiness, Buddha’s Brain, Just One Thing, and Mother Nurture – with 900,000 copies in English alone. His free weekly newsletter has 150,000 subscribers and his online programs have scholarships available for those with financial need. He’s lectured at NASA, Google, Oxford, and Harvard, and taught in meditation centers worldwide. An expert on positive neuroplasticity, his work has been featured on the BBC, CBS, NPR, and other major media. He began meditating in 1974 and is the founder of the Wellspring Institute for Neuroscience and Contemplative Wisdom. He loves wilderness and taking a break from emails.

People often mistake numbness for nothingness, but numbness isn’t the absence of feelings; it’s a response to being overwhelmed by too many feelings.”

– Lori Gottlieb

Our brain has three primary motivational systems – Avoiding harms, Approaching rewards, and Attaching to “us” – that draw on many neural networks to accomplish their goals.

Lately, I’ve started to realize that a fourth fundamental human motivational system could be emerging as well.

– Dr. Rick Hanson

Lori Gottlieb is an American writer and psychotherapist, who writes the weekly “Dear Therapist” advice column for The Atlantic. She has written for many publications, including The New York Times, Time, Slate, People, Elle, Glamour, Cosmopolitan, and O, The Oprah Magazine. She frequently appears as an expert on mental health topics on television and radio such as The Today Show, Good Morning America, The CBS Early Show, CNN, the BBC, and NPR.
Rick Hanson, PhD is a psychologist, Senior Fellow of UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center, and New York Times best-selling author. His books have been published in 29 languages and include Neurodharma, Resilient, Hardwiring Happiness, Buddha’s Brain, Just One Thing, and Mother Nurture – with 900,000 copies in English alone. His free weekly newsletter has 150,000 subscribers and his online programs have scholarships available for those with financial need. He’s lectured at NASA, Google, Oxford, and Harvard, and taught in meditation centers worldwide. An expert on positive neuroplasticity, his work has been featured on the BBC, CBS, NPR, and other major media. He began meditating in 1974 and is the founder of the Wellspring Institute for Neuroscience and Contemplative Wisdom. He loves wilderness and taking a break from emails.

Visit the Book Passage website to have any of Lori’s books or any of Rick’s books delivered right to your door.

You’re sure to enjoy these Book Passage favorites:

Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed

Maybe you should talk

Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough

Marry Him

Hardwiring Happiness: The New Brain Science of Contentment, Calm, and Confidence

Hardwiring Happiness

Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness

Resilient- How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness

A personal note from Lori Gottleib and Dr. Rick Hanson.

Sent May 19th, following their Conversations with Authors session.

A huge thanks to all who joined our conversation Sunday!

I’m so grateful to all of you and to Rick Hanson and Book Passage for making this happen. I teared up when I saw Elaine sitting in the bookstore, one of my favorites, because it reminded me of the joy I get from independent booksellers, and I always enjoy the opportunity to explore the human condition with fellow therapist and writer Rick Hanson.

One of the reasons I wrote Maybe You Should Talk To Someone is that I believe in the power of story––and especially in the power of seeing ourselves through the lens of other people’s stories. So while we muddle our way through this challenging time, here are some books I recommend that I hope you’ll find helpful in a variety of ways.

  • The Gift of Therapy by Irvin Yalom. Often considered to be “the Oliver Sacks of psychiatry,” Yalom, a professor emeritus of psychiatry at Stanford, has been revolutionary in bringing his patients’ stories to life in the pages of his books. Ostensibly a guide to therapy, The Gift of Therapy is actually a moving, incisive, and unforgettable portrait of our shared humanity that helps us re-examine our own stories and our capacity for growth and change.  
  • We Learn Nothing by Tim Kreider. Despite the title, Kreider’s hilarious, candid, and wholly original essays on everything from what makes a family to why we fall in love with people we don’t even like teaches us a great deal about the big questions we all ask ourselves–and offers a new way to think about them. 
  • It’s Okay To Laugh (Cryng is Cool Too) by Nora McInerny. If you’re human, you’ll experience of loss. For Nora McInerny, it happened when she was in her twenties and in love with her future husband who was diagnosed with brain cancer. If this sounds depressing, her memoir is anything but. It’s heartbreaking, sure–but it’s also raw, funny, moving, and one of the most enlightening stories of the paradoxes of grief–and what it means not to move on, but to move forward.
  • 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do by Amy Morin. Based on her viral blog post read by 30 million people, 13 Things is Amy Morin’s brilliant guide to how become more resilient by not getting in our own ways. Morin, a psychotherapist, shares her own experience using these techniques when tragedy struck three times in just as many years, and shows us how to break self-defeating patterns that hold us back in all aspects of our lives.
  • Hyperbole and a Half by Allie Brosh. Based on her wildly popular blog, Brosh brings us a searingly funny, poignant, and thought-provoking look into her emotional struggles while making them relatable to everyone. A Bill Gates book pick, this graphic memoir entertains and informs, reducing stigma and holding up a mirror to all of us, then topping it off with a huge does of hope.

It was such a pleasure to talk with Lori Gottlieb, and with such a gracious host as Elaine Petrocelli. I hope our conversation was helpful to everyone who had a chance to hear it.

If you’d like additional resources related to coping with stress and developing resilient well-being, including several guided meditations, please see https://www.rickhanson.net/bookpassage/.

Lately I’ve been reflecting on the importance of honoring that inner sense in each of us of an underlying calm strength and warm heart – and the value, even when things are at their worst (and especially when they are at their worst) of moxie, courageous compassion, and inner peace. Both Lori’s Maybe You Should Talk to Someone and my own Neurodharma speak to this.

If I could offer two others, they would be John Steinbeck’s East of Eden and Olga Tokarczuk’s Drive Your Plow over the Bones of the Dead

With many good wishes,

– Lori and Rick